A crazy week

First, I have no internet where I live right now. It won't be back on for another few days, so I am stuck using the computers at school whenever I have time. The reason for this insanity? We moved this weekend (actually Sunday and Monday), and don't have the cable or internet hooked up yet. Also, this week is finals week. It makes life kind of crazy right now. My first final was today, and I have another one tomorrow.

I also had a T session in which we searched for the core self. He accidently "tripped" over a recurring nightmare that I have had for years. He also identified...although most here don't believe it...one who seems to have all of the characteristics listed. I don't see how it's possible, but I'm willing to try to look past the improbalities to see the possibilities. Maybe it's right, and we can start moving forward. Hmmm...we'll see.

I had a meeting with the counselor on Wednesday as well. We didn't really get anywhere. I guess with all of the moving and studying going on, there hasn't really been time for much else to happen. I always feel bad on days when I go in there and don't have much to say that is "work" related. I feel like I'm wasting her time, and that it really isn't fair to her. (Although I know that she would disagree with that.)

We did talk a little about my beliefs that I am an awful person and conviction that no one else knows the truth. I suppose that she and the T are right, in that I cannot assume that they know nothing since they have no information on which to base beliefs. I do like the fact that I am usually able to step outside of myself and look objectively at subjective situations. I had to admit to the counselor though that this MIGHT not be one of those situations. I reserve judgement until all of the evidence has rolled in. I still think that I am right, but am willing to consider other possibilities if there is enough evidence in support of their opinions.

We also talked about the recurring dream, and my lack of emotions. Is it truly a lack of feeling? Or is it just burried? I guess there's really not much way to know right now.

I'm sure that I have a lot more to write...but I can't think of it now. It will just have to wait until the next time I have access to the internet. Who knows when that will be.

Me